I am nearing the end of my Pediatrics Acting Internship. Waaay back in first year, when I learned that we had to do two "AIs," the thought was absolutely terrifying. It wasn't until well into third year that I realized that it was not something fully beyond my capabilities. I enjoyed my third year rotation in peds, but it was not my favorite. I was actually a bit disappointed that I didn't absolutely love it. So, at the beginning of this rotation, I felt confident in my abilities, but worried that I'd feel the same way about inpatient peds as I did back in February.
I am happy to report that this rotation has probably been my best ever as a student. I still have a LOT to learn before I can be a confident intern. A lot lot lot to learn. But, in a mere four weeks, I've seen enough in myself to know that I'll be able to do it when the time comes. Even better than all that, though, is the fact that I did not dread coming into the hospital even once this whole month. Unlike all my other rotations where I would cling desperately to those last minutes of sleep wishing that I would wake up to discover that it was actually a day off. I wasn't all gung-ho, get to the hospital at 5 am or anything. But I actually looked forward to certain aspects of it all.
What a relief. There is nothing worse than questioning why I am here. I mean, I question it every day ("I really want to be a doctor? Seriously? Why?!? ") but every day, I get a little more foundation and a little more evidence that this is a good thing.
Plus, I can always retire early and become the film critic I know I was born to be!
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