You're Going to Feel a Little Pressure in Your Bottom

It's time for me to admit something. It is something that I've kept secret for... well, about a year now. I didn't tell because I was embarassed...ashamed...and secretly quite happy about it. Ready? Until about 2:00 this afternoon, I had never performed a rectal exam. I know, right? A medical student making it ALL the way through third year of medical school (read: The Year of the Scut without uttering the dreaded phrase "Relax, you're going to feel some pressure..." I even did Trauma! Every trauma patient gets a rectal, and all the surgery residents get to do their evil little laughs when they say "Student! Rectal!"

Anyway. I've done one now. That's a relief...

For those of you who have seen me in person in the last few weeks and know how much I despise the Emergency Room (this coming from a girl who has at least kind of liked everything up to this point), I must say: it is MUCH more exciting when there are at least two demented patients, each trying to out-scream the other. (Pt 1: Ahhhh! Pt 2: AHHHHhhh! Pt 1: Uhh-AHHHHHH!) Throw in a third who won't stay in her bed (Pt 3: Hell, hell, hell-hell), and Brenna may just change her tune.

Except that I got some man's nasty trauma blood on my white coat.

Hmm. At least it wasn't nasty fecal matter.