Killer Elevators

Do you ever let inanimate objects define your day? Or... I guess in the case of elevators, it would be an animate inanimate object.

So, there are three main towers in the hospital here - Reynolds (named after the great tobacco baron from this area), Ardmore (named after ?) and North (named after the direction?) all of which have two sets of elevators - patient/visitor elevators and the staff elevators. The staff ones are big for the transport of things like vacuum cleaners, patients and unit secretaries (who are, generally, the largest people in the hospital) There is one elevator in Ardmore that makes me want to waltz in it. It is GIGANTIC.

Okay. So, every morning, I get on the North elevators to fifth floor. I've found that the patient elevators are faster in North, so I take those. There is one (of the six possible) that smells like dirty gym socks. Gross. I've found that whenever I end up on the stinky sweat sock elevator in the morning, my day, likewise, stinks. Crazy superstition maybe, but it seems to be true.

Guess which elevator greeted me this morning?

But that was only the beginning of the Attack of the Evil Elevators. Later this morning, an elevator tried to EAT me. For no reason. It openedthenshut really fast. While I was trying to walk thru it.

And, progressively throughout the day, every single elevator I got on decided to inexplicably stop on EVERY SINGLE FLOOR. I had to go to a trauma code - in the sub-basement - from 11th floor. We stopped on 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 1, M, and G. And that is the elevator that doesn't stop on 1 or 2.

Freaking elevators.

Almost made me look forward to the relative emptiness of the elevators while I'm on call tonight.

I really do prefer stairwells. The acoustics are much better for whistling.

Now, ask yourself: why did you bother reading this entire post? Elevators are kinda boring...