Ashes to Ashes

And so the dreaded surgery rotation ends, not with a bang, but a whimper (that being the sound of me during the test) My favorite part of the test was the last 25 or so questions, that were T/F questions, thus increasing the yield of my full-on guessing to 50%!!! Them are some good odds, when you compare it to the other 140 or so questions. All take a moment to appreciate the gods of the True/False question.

::Moment::

Okay, then. So, I didn't do all the procedures on my little procedure card, but I knew that Susan had dealt with this same issue, in what I thought was a decisive and firm manner. Nope. Card not signed on every line, guess what? You don't get a grade in surgery! Yippee for me. This means that I: a) get to fail surgery; b) have to spend the weekend wandering around begging someone to let me insert an NG tube and get an arterial blood gas; or c) sign the freaking card myself and send in interoffice mail. Hmmm. Wonder which one I'll do. Ridiculous. I pride myself on honesty in these situations, but good grief. I made a point of asking the course director day 1 if we were required to do every single one, and he said NO.

Along with the end of a rotation comes a sense of... let-down, I guess. I felt this way at the end of every section during the first two years, too. I've given heart and soul to the last eight weeks of my life, and all of a sudden, it's over. Just like that. I'm glad, but I want more! I hate such abrupt changes like this. The people that I've gotten to know over the last month or so, that I may never see again. It's just weird. The gloomy weather isn't helping any, either.

I really could see myself as a surgeon, so here is my decision: If I get honors in surgery, I'll become a surgeon. This is an easy , decisive statement for me to make, because I'm 99.9% certain that I won't get honors. And that 0.01% of doubt is in there only because nothing in life is certain.

I saw FNI today! Except, I realized, he's no longer FNI. He has to be FNR now, being that he transitioned into his second year of residency months ago. He was in a full-out suit. And tie. I can't figure out why... Mysterious FNR... Hmmm.

Tonight is Class Party Night. It is a Themed Class Party, too. Red Neck, or some such. Susan and I will be venturing to the Goodwill to attempt to find something to fit the bill. I am not sure whether (MM)PWHM will be there or not. I have heard they are leaving town, so I'm hoping they go now. The party would be more fun if I didn't have to worry about run-ins. I'm sick of the run-ins.

Blech. I need to go do something to improve my mood. Maybe I'll actually make it to the Y today... Or the mall...!